WOC – Page 6 – BOLT: Black Old Lesbians Traveling

The B in BOLT…Reflections on Traveling Black

June 6, 2016 by BOLT, posted in African American, Black, buddhist, family, Fun, Gay, generational, Lesbian, life coach, Long distance, Long term travel, Old, POC, queer, retirement, spiritual, Travel, WOC, Women

This is a post I’ve wanted to write for a while. I’m trying to find ways to express succinctly what is on my heart and in my mind. Being Black is such a large part of who we are. Kathy and I are intentionally Black, consciously Black and unapologetically Black. It’s not about hate for non-blacks. It’s a love thing.

Our blackness, not just our skin, but our thinking, our memories, our very essence goes with us everywhere we go. We have found great blessings traveling Black and a few challenges.

One of the greatest gifts of travel has been our heightened sense of appreciation for black folks, especially in places where there are not a lot of us. Walking down Crenshaw in Los Angeles, California I always smiled and gave a nod to my peeps. But seeing a black man or woman in Southeast Asia is a different experience. It’s an opportunity for conversation, exchanging experiences and most of all a chance to share a little black love.

And this is not an experience unique to Asia. Traveling across the U.S.A., visiting National Parks we rarely see other Black folks. We went days and miles on a trip up to Canada. We were delighted to meet a Black couple in Glacier National Park, Wyoming. We had a good laugh when we realized we were all from California.

Traveling Black in Africa increases our commitment to love and serve Black folk, all across the diaspora. It also is a great reality check for the privilege that comes with our American passports and lifestyle.

It reminds us of our commonalities, especially with other Black women.

Traveling Black strengthens our love for and connections to people of color. The Malaysian man, next to Kathy, in the picture above commented on their identical skin tone and the beauty there. Celebrating diversity is one more thing to love about traveling Black.

Sultans Water Palace, Yogyakarta, Java, Indonesia

The biggest challenge so far in traveling Black has been an ocasional sense of isolation and of being on display, a curiosity. We felt this most acutely in Vietnam where our skin was often stroked, our hair frequently gently pulled. It never felt malicious or racist. I know racism and colorism exist everywhere, but to paraphrase the late, great Muhammad Ali, no one in Southeast Asia has ever called me or anyone I love a nigger. I for sure can’t say that about the USA!

Traveling Black is a chance to explore your entrepreneurial side. We love shopping and bringing back beautiful things from all over the world.

Charlotte and Pete Hill O'Neal, Arusha, Tanzania

New and Old Friends, New Orleans, Louisiana

Aida Ayers, Creative Solutions, Zanzibar

Traveling Black is a great way to make new friends and to connect with old. In this digital age it is very easy to make connections and stay connected. Black Americans Living Abroad is a great Facebook group for just that purpose. Nomadness Tribe and Travel Noire are both wonderful sites as well. One of the best parts about traveling Black is doing it with people you love and respect.

BOLT Reviews : Chiang Mai, Thailand ♡♡♡♡♡♡

May 29, 2016May 30, 2016 by BOLT, posted in African American, Black, buddhist, family, Fun, Gay, generational, Lesbian, life coach, Long distance, Long term travel, Old, POC, queer, retirement, spiritual, Travel, WOC, Women

My friend, Lecia, reminded me today that it’s been a while since we posted a BOLT review. We left, what feels like our second home, Chiang Mai on Thursday. It’s a beautiful day here in Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia, a great day to take a little time to share our opinions about Chiang Mai.

We both love Chiang Mai. The ancient part of the city, surrounded by a moat is so beautiful, full of sacred sites. We find it very healing. It is also very walkable, which is important to us.

There is also the Chiang Mai that is new, modern and fabulous! We are able to find anything we need or want.

The food in Chiang Mai is some of the best we have had anywhere, and very affordable too.

When we get tired of Thai food there are lots of other options to choose from.

And lots of fresh fruits and vegetables!

Accommodations in Chiang Mai are abundant and very affordable. For the last 2 months we stayed at a studio apartment with pool for less than $ 250 a month! It was simple and clean, no frills.

There are also plenty of beautiful higher end accommodations.

There is a lot to do in Chiang Mai. The city has frequent cultural festivals, many museums and there are beautiful temples at every turn.

We love our evening walks along the moat.

There are literally massages on every block and one hour is generally less than $ 10.

You can try something new, like this fish spa.

Thai people are very polite, friendly and helpful. It’s great staying somewhere long enough to get to know our neighbors.

The only thing that would make Chiang Mai better (for us) would be more visitors from home. If you are intrigued or have any questions we would love to hear from you in the comments section below.

Uh Oh! Do-Over and Never Again!

May 22, 2016May 22, 2016 by BOLT, posted in African American, Black, buddhist, family, Fun, Gay, generational, Lesbian, life coach, Long distance, Long term travel, Old, POC, queer, retirement, spiritual, Travel, WOC, Women

Kathy and I have been traveling for eight months now. We’ve been extremely blessed with drama free experiences, good travel health and very few problems. We’ve learned a lot about what works for us, what we love and what we prefer to avoid.

Uh Oh!

There is a vast difference between economy class...

Economy Class Train Travel
While traveling through Indonesia we missed a connection to the “first class” train we had reservations for. An economy class train was leaving the station soon. Rather than wait a whole day for the next first class train we decided to hop on this really low priced train. I remember thinking “how bad can it be?”. Well, it was pretty bad. Economy trains make more stops so the anticipated 4 hour ride turned into 8. The seats were uncushioned, hard benches. We had to sit 3 across where even 2 people would have been uncomfortable. There was no air conditioning. I was pretty miserable for most of the trip. The upside was we were sitting with very kind and helpful local people. Locals travel this way all the time, it is not for me for long trips. The experience helped me see how privileged we are and also what I’m willing to pay more for. This Uh Oh! was a great learning experience.

Do-Over…

On our second visit to Georgetown we rode the ferry instead of the very expensive taxi we took on our first visit.

We got to explore so much of Georgetown, including this beautiful Burmese Temple.

And all of our wonderful Chinese New Year experiences.

Georgetown, Penang Island, Malaysia

When we first got off the boat, landing in Singapore, we moved pretty quickly. We spent a day and a night in Singapore, 4 days in Kualu Lumpur and 5 days in Georgetown. Neither of us were crazy about Georgetown. We had yet to learn the value of slower travel, longer stays. I’m really glad we made a decision to visit Georgetown again. Exploring this lovely island town a second time, for a whole month was a wonderful experience. Now Georgetown is one of our favorite places, it’s even on our short list for a permanent retirement home.

Never Again!

Questioning our visit to the Tiger Kingdom, Mae Rim/Chiang Mai, Thailand.

Tiger Kingdom, Chiang Mai, Thailand

We visited the Tiger Kingdom on our first visit to Chiang Mai on a whim. We did no research. We just hopped into the cab of a friendly driver for what I thought would be a pleasant adventure. Had we done more investigation we would have easily seen that there is a lot of controversy about this place. Mistreated, drugged tigers are kept in small cages. Tourists (including Kathy and I) lie on, pet and take lots of pictures with these beautiful animals. I wanted to believe what the keepers say: that the cats are not drugged, that they grew up with people and are thus friendly. But I left with the nagging feelings that those things are not true. I have decided to never again visit attractions involving animals without first making sure the animals are being treated humanely.

The animals at the Sacred Monkey Forest in Ubud, Bali, Indonesia are free and happy.

Home free, serendipitous travel has great opportunities to find out more about oneself. I’ve learned that I like a certain level of comfort and am willing to pay for it; that staying long enough to get to know a place is best and that thorough research is a valuable tool in deciding where to visit.

What are some of your travel uh ohs, do-overs or never agains? Please share in our comments section. We love hearing from you!

White is Beautiful

May 12, 2016 by BOLT, posted in African American, Black, Fun, Gay, Lesbian, Long distance, Long term travel, Old, POC, queer, retirement, Travel, Uncategorized, WOC, Women

When I saw the photos of Lil’ Kim I felt for her and her struggle with colorism and her own self-identity. I wish I could say I don’t understand it or could never see myself doing such a thing but the truth is there was a time in my life where I stared in the mirror and tweaked at my round nose and sucked in my thick lips and thought I would look better without so much Africa on my face. Lil’ Kim just happens to have the misfortune of being blessed with the money and the time it takes transform a person of African heritage into a person who shows no sign of that heritage.

Twenty years ago I may have tried to whiten my skin and bleach my hair. But the products were very expensive in those days and their efficacy questionable at best. These days that has all changed and although it has been decades since I have thought of myself as too African looking I have seen with my own eyes how ubiquitous and inexpensive these products are.

The rise in skin whitening sales is hard to overstate. Even poverty seems to be little barrier to the purchase of these products. Indeed I have found it to be less expensive to purchase products such as face cream, body wash, even deodorant with whitener than it is to buy it without the added chemical bleaching agents. It is certainly less time-consuming with most of the store shelves choked in bleaching agents here in Thailand.

Southeast Asia is one of the most beautifully diverse places on earth. People range in all sizes and all hues. The skin whitening industry is taking a toll on the faces and skin tones of this beautiful multifarious region. Although mostly advertised to women, the necessity for white skin is also sold to men and children. And when we first came here and saw how much a part of everyday life skin-bleaching is I was appaled and insulted. I thought of these women as self-hating and wishing to be white. Although it can be argued that pursuit of whiteness in Asia is not a by-product of Western entertainment and beauty standards, it cannot be said that this practice is harmless. Whiteners have several side effects such as early onset of cataracts and osteoporosis. Another truth is there is a direct benefit to having lighter skin here in Asia. Darker women are less likely to be hired for front desk work even with the same qualifications as their lighter counterparts. Asian men have shown a bias towards lighter women when looking for a marriage partner. Eventhough corporations are only advertising a product, they have locked into a history of colorism which serves to buoy their claims of white is beautiful.

Yet not everyone is falling for this deceptive and dangerous trend. In fac fanon t in India the sales of whiteners has seen a sharp decline especially in the sale of men’s products.

But most interesting to me is what the women are
doing. So while ladies especially but men too are affected by these whiteness campaigns all over Asia and the world, in India another type of advertisement has taken hold and made good progress in fighting colorism. Dark Is Beautiful, a slogan by Women of Worth organization against whitening and skin tone preference and color bias. Turns out being brown and proud works.

How We Afford Full-time Travel

March 3, 2016March 3, 2016 by BOLT, posted in African American, Black, Fun, Gay, Lesbian, Long distance, Long term travel, Old, POC, queer, retirement, Travel, WOC, Women

I know some of you, a lot of you were very interested in Marci’s post about how much we spend on a daily basis here in beautiful Southeast Asia. I thought this would be a great time to tell how we get the bills so low.

First let me say that there is a post somewhere that talks about how we got started. You know: saving, selling, dreaming, doing. But once here we still have daily expenses. No matter what we all eat everyday. Here in Southeast Asia we eat very well everyday. The food is not to be believed. So how do save on food? First we adopted a tentative monthly budget for everything. I said it would be $1000 a month for the two of us. Marci said I was nuts. She was right. We now have a pretty firm budget of $1200 a month. But I have to say when were in Chiang Mai we spent $800 a month. More on that in a later post.

So once you know your monthly budget y
ou just divide by 30 and you get a daily budget. For us that comes out to $40 a day. Not a lot of money but it is very inexpensive to live here. With that we must pay for a place to stay, food, transportation and entertainment. Here is the thing. The longer you stay in one place the fewer dollars, ringit, baht, rupiah, etc you will spend. So if one day we go over budget because we wanna see the Vietnamese Water Puppets, the next two days we go some place beautiful but free or inexpensive, like Hanoi’s Temple of Literature. This marvelous temple complex is $1 to enter. We walked and had lunch on the way. It is an average after all. But at the end of the month we want to have spent less than our budget.

Saving money on food is as easy as eating what the locals eat. Western food here is very expensive and not very good. Street food here is incredibly delicious and almost free. Our daily budget is $10. (No alcohol. We don’t drink.)

Breakfast is sometimes included in the price of our accommodations. This is optimal to a point. Since we average about $3 a meal it does not make sense for us to spend more than about $5 over our daily budget of $20 a day for housing. But the extra $2 is worth it so we don’t have to leave too early in the morning.

Lunch is our biggest meal of the day. We always go out for it and we eat mostly street food. You can find delicious gourmet meals served at a sit down restaurant for much less during lunch when compared to dinner prices. Be mindful of the most touristy areas as they will have the worst food and the worst prices.

For most of you budgeting may be easier because your budget will be larger. But a larger budget is not the only thing that makes for an easy budget. Financial discipline is required. For some of you your budget will be smaller. You can do this too. If you have been following the BOLT FaceBook page, you know Marci and I are not living like paupers. The amount is up to you and your bank account. For the purposes of these posts we will stick with $1200 a month for two adults who like each other enough to share a room everyday.

Why we Travel

March 3, 2015March 3, 2015 by BOLT, posted in Fun, Long distance, Long term travel, Old, POC, retirement, Travel, WOC, Women

Travel is scary. It can be expensive. Simply planning a trip can be daunting. It can be uncomfortable once you set out and find yourself in unfamiliar surroundings. But for Marci and I that is the point. We want to be in spaces that challenge and stretch us. Not because we are saints or masochists but because we have been fortunate enough to grow up and live in relative comfort most of our lives. When we travel we often comment on how uncomfortable we are. But the truth becomes obvious once you set out to places different from our home. Most of the world lives in situations that are uncomfortable for sixty year old women. They may carry their water from a well, for example. I hate doing that. They plant and harvest their own food. I hate that too. They may go to the bathroom outside of their homes. I really hate that.

But for us it is not the hate we remember. Even now writing this I can’t remember all the things I hate about visiting villages and doing what the women there do. But the love is carried with us. We love visiting women in their homes. We love accompanying them to their work spaces. We love helping to prepare a meal. We are dismal at it all. And most of it is smelly and hard. But it is in these spaces where we find our truest love.

Our love of women of color. Women of means when it looks as if they have no means. Women of resource who look as if they are in poverty. These snaggle-toothed, smiling women who laugh at our feeble attempts to do one fifth of the work they accomplish daily are our truest and deepest loves. It is to them that we travel. For with them we too have an unseen value. A value that is not calculated in how well we cook or how many buckets of water we carry. Our value is multiplied by their patience with our well-intentioned ineptitude as verified by their simple words of “Welcome”. Whether it be in Tagalog – maligayang pagdating or Swahili -karibu or Wolof – dalal ak diam. Or a myriad of other ways, we are better for the experience.

We make no allusions as to our benefit to them. We recognize that when we arrive (most of the time unannounced because of how difficult it can be to communicate with small villages in developing nations) we are an extra expense at best and a downright hardship most of the time. Yet they smile, nod and share their food and homes with us. So although we may hate sleeping on dusty mattresses, we recognize we have the best beds around because someone else is sleeping on the floor. When we complain about having to go to the bathroom outside, we recognize that before the toilet was dug these people went outside for real. It is there where we smile and realize in a very tangible way how blessed we are to have this life and to have the opportunity to travel.

Welcome to BOLT. Our wish for you is that you will travel in spite of the difficulty. Maybe this site will inspire you. Thank you for reading.

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